I was furious with myself yesterday and as for today...I'm still mad, but embarrassment has surpassed my anger. I fell off my green broke mare, Rain, yesterday...TWICE! It should have never happened and it is all my fault, hence the fact I'm mad. Let's recap...
I did a five minute lunge session with Rain earlier in the week that went really good. Other than that short work out I haven't worked or rose her in several weeks. Yesterday I decided it was too gorgeous a day plus I really need to get her broke plus horses are good for my soul, anyways that was a side note...I decided to work Rain, with all intentions of riding her just a little bit. As I was lunging her she gave me a couple subtle clues that she was feeling something, may be frisky? I even recall asking her if she had a burr under her saddle. Uh, hello?! Anyone else see a big hint right there? But noooo, I ignored it because like I said, the clue was subtle(even though I did notice it!) She was doing so good for not having been seriously worked in a while that I decided to go ahead and ride her. In a normal situation I have enough caution(read fear of falling) that I would have either lunged her a lot more(although she is out of shape so this isn't much of an option) or I would have just not gotten on her. Yesterday was clearly not my best day for being normal. After riding her at a walk for a while and dealing with her wanting to keep going to the same spot in the round pen to be closer to Foster who was eating hay next to the round pen, I decided she was being so good(I was ignoring the fact that every time I cued her away from Foster I kept thinking, this could make her upset) I wanted to trot her. So I did. It took two strides of trot and there was the mounting block coming up and I could tell she wasn't sure which way to go and I hadn't told her which way to go(I've been trying to work more on stopping on command than steering). So she got antsy, taking a couple quick steps and I started bouncing and she started bucking(big crow hops, no kicking out the hind legs) and I lost my balance and fell. I got up as quickly as I could and got back on her. She was still upset from what happened and I once again ignored the warnings. We walked ten steps maybe and a horse fly landed on her shoulder. What did I do? Leaned forward(read put myself off center and out of balance on a tense horse) and smacked the horsefly. What did she do? Crow hopped forward and off I fell!
What should I have done. Never got on her in the first place. But since I did, I shouldn't have gotten back on her so quickly after the first fall. What did I do after the 2nd fall, ran her butt around the round pen and then had hubby lead me around on her for half a lap or so. By that time she was still nervous and breathing hard. I knew I had to get on her again and she needed lunged 'cause she was acting stupid after the 2nd fall, but I know that all of it should never have happened. It was a bad experience for us both and that makes me furious at myself. So make sure you follow your instincts people! If you know what you're doing, trust that! Don't ignore your gut.
Anyways, writing-wise I have a very basic and tentative outline started for the sequel to my current WIP. I also have a few scene ideas for it. Now the not so good news is that I still haven't wrote the scene I need to add in, although I have put ink to paper for the next chapter. I'm just not in the mood to write it plus while I have a tentative idea of what should happen, I'm not feeling it. I don't know if the idea is wrong or what. Ok, problem needs to be tackled head first. I'm stopping blogging right now and I'm going to write that scene even if it's slush. At least I can edit slush; it's hard to edit a blank page!